# Question Of The Week... ( 2016 Week 9 )



## ripjack13 (Feb 28, 2016)

*If you were to have a tool named after you, Tell us about the name of it, and what would it be?*






**Rules**
There is no minimum post requirement,
primates, woodticks and leprechauns are welcome to post an answer.
And of course the  and the woodturner from NY too...


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## Tclem (Feb 28, 2016)

It would be called " the best of the best". Simply because it was named after yours truly and it could do anything just because I am the best

Reactions: Funny 2


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## Kevin (Feb 28, 2016)

Texas Tony would be a No. 7 Stanley plane because he is the same height as the plane is long.

Jon is razor knife. I mean he needs to use one more often on that lumberjack mug of his.

Tom manbuck is a Halligan Bar because that's what he uses to break through National Forest gates and chop down all those woody diamonds.

Colin is not a tool but more like a shop full of them . . . he's a one man assembly line.

El Guapo is a carcass saw, because unless he gets a handle on his wood buying his carcass is all we gonna saw of him once El Guapa is through with him.

Marc is a scrub plane, because he is always scrubbing everything in sight clean as a whistle . . . . so he can put 5 coats of paint on it.

Greg tick is a file. He makes sharp tools. He's also a square; _I don't drink don't smoke don't cuss don't chew and I don't go with women who do!_

Greg XXX is ear plugs. All those concerts made him deaf and he's trying to save what little is left . . . _EH? SAY WHAT?!_.

Super Duck is a 8" auger bit. So he can get his bait and tackle below the ice. He wishes his bait and tackle were also 8".

Barry R is a multi-purpose tool; a talented badass that can use his Swiss Army knife to create works of art, build a cabin in the woods, or single-handedly wipe out a marauding band of nogoodniks all with equal enthusiasm.

And obviously Brink would be a ...(drum roll)... monkey wrench.

Shadetree Joe is a hack saw. For when he wants to cut off his thumb but his table saw isn't handy.

Duncan is a folding rule. He comes from an island where kings and queens are important to society and young little Redcoats grow up dreaming of being a ruler too one day . . .

Brink is a podger spanner - he uses it to construct his tower of lies (you didn't think you were getting off with just the monkey wrench did you?).

Scott NYW is a slide rule; he can figure out anything in any discipline.

Sprung is a duplicator. _"I plan to get one of those too . . . . ." "I wish I could afford some of that too . . . . " "I've also been thinking about getting one of those too . . . " "I just sold a pen so now I can buy one of those too . . . "_

JR Parks is a shovel. No not just because he is knee deep in his own BS but because he is Texas' version of Smokey da Bear...
View attachment 98064

Mike the Red Raider is an abacus. It comes in handy when counting all those beans.

Rodney is a flint and steel, to get that smoker fired up. He's also a tool box because he can get anything you might ever need.

Sprucegum Dave is a funnel and hose (and I am about out of syrup).

Cody is a fish hook so he can hang with his floats.

Zuma is a magnifying glass - gotta grade those coins!

Chuck the Nature Man is a wicker basket - he likes to run through the forest naked picking berries and grapes all the while whistling _Puff the Magic Dragon_.

Wild Thing Barry is a tape measure and weight scale because that's his trade secret.

Allan is a dolabra on a pogo stick. He hops around hundreds of acres of icy ranch like it's his playground, branding and slaughtering cattle, chopping down trees, swapping out a transmission and everything in between . . . yeehaw!!!

Scott the Strut Stopper is a scalpel .... to cut out those big fans.

Doc is a 5" swing brace because he goes both ways. He wishes he were a 10" swing brace.

Brown Down is a bear trap . . . not to catch bears but evil snipers hiding in the woods (did they ever get that guy?).

TimR is a comb (he dreams about needing one).

Tom the Crazy Croat is a hand file; that's all he needs to create an exquisite knife including chopping down the tree, milling the scales, shaping the steel, making the pins, putting a mirror finish on blade and scales, and etching the blade with his signature octopus. Then diving with it to the bottom of the sea on a single breath to catch dinner. Just a file ... that's all he needs.

Robert the Flynt is half of a broken worn out file, because that's all he needs to do the same thing.

 Mike would be a hammer . . . after all he invented it.

Lonestar Ray is a hammer forge . . . after all he invented it (Mike ain't got nothing on Ray!).

Henry would be a compass ... it's shorthand for *comp*lete *ass*. He'd also make a good set of dividers since he is always 

Tony Clem would be an adze because he can't do multiplication, division, or subtraction; but he can adze _2 hair sticks + 3 hair sticks = $50 so I can buy more knife scales to replace the ones I screwed up!!!_

Kenbo is a . . . . Canadian. Hey they did build the robotic arm for a space shuttle once so they are not totally useless. 








Oh I guess I have to say what I am . . . . I'm a spud wrench.

Reactions: Like 1 | Great Post 2 | Funny 6 | Creative 1


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## ripjack13 (Feb 28, 2016)

Tclem said:


> It would be called " the best of the best". Simply because it was named after yours truly and it could do anything just because I am the best

Reactions: Funny 1


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## Tclem (Feb 28, 2016)

ripjack13 said:


> Kevin had answered this already in my Draft topic in our backroom/sawdust room....here it is in it's entirety.
> enjoy.


That was a mouth full

Reactions: Like 1


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## Brink (Feb 28, 2016)

No! Don't even go there!

Reactions: Like 1 | Funny 2


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## Brink (Feb 28, 2016)

Mine would be the Brink patent improved bug extractor.

Reactions: Like 3 | Funny 2


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## woodtickgreg (Feb 28, 2016)

Well I do have wood tick tools too! But I like Kevins reply better. But Kev is wrong on one thing, I do swear, watch what happens when I hit my hand with a hammer! I use all of my favorite words, lol.

Reactions: Like 1 | Funny 1


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## NYWoodturner (Feb 28, 2016)

Brink said:


> Mine would be the Brink patent improved bug extractor.
> 
> View attachment 98386


Brink - forget the bugs man! Cut up that burl you have your hand on!!!

Reactions: Like 1


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## Schroedc (Feb 28, 2016)

Mine would be the Schroeder Honey Do Tool

A multi tool with everything you need for the ever growing list of things my wife keeps asking me to do. With built in flask for scotch to make it all the more fun!

Reactions: Like 2


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## Brink (Feb 28, 2016)

NYWoodturner said:


> Brink - forget the bugs man! Cut up that burl you have your hand on!!!



Termite nest

Reactions: Like 1 | Agree 1


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## David Hill (Feb 28, 2016)

Hmmm.... Thinking I've been left _out_
My tool would be....... A Tool Mark Remover-- for those bowls/vessels/platters that'cha juuust don't want to risk chasing.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Nature Man (Feb 28, 2016)

Wood Chuck. Chuck

Reactions: Like 1


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## Kevin (Feb 28, 2016)

David Hill said:


> Hmmm.... Thinking I've been left _out_



A lot of members were. I went down the 24 hour check in list and picked the active members. See what you get when you don't sign in for so long? You avoid getting pranked lol.

Reactions: Funny 5


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## Brink (Feb 28, 2016)

Was I on the list twice?


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## Kevin (Feb 28, 2016)

Brink said:


> Was I on the list twice?



I realize you cannot count so yes, two times is twice.

Reactions: Funny 3


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## justallan (Feb 28, 2016)

Now granted I had to google "dolabra", but I'm pretty sure by the looks of that thing a lot of folks would say it fits my attitude pretty well, but I'm actually all bluff.

Reactions: Like 1 | +Karma 1 | Sincere 1


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## ChrisStef (Feb 29, 2016)

Id be a #78 plane. Kinda ok to look at but a real pain in the ass to use. Works about half the time you expect it to and is always missing the nicker.

Reactions: Funny 2


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## CWS (Feb 29, 2016)

A board strecher. If they didn't find me handsome at least they would find handy. (RED GREEN)

Reactions: Funny 1


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## duncsuss (Feb 29, 2016)

Brink said:


> Termite nest


Do you think you could stabilize it?

Reactions: Funny 1


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## Brink (Mar 1, 2016)

duncsuss said:


> Do you think you could stabilize it?



It was pretty stable.

Reactions: Like 1


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