# It's been a rotten year so far



## burlforbrains (Jul 26, 2016)

it all started back in December. I called my Dad, in Ohio for my weekly call. I needed to check on him regularly (89) As he lives alone now that my Mom has been put in a memory care home( fairly severe dementia). He'd go visit her almost every day as it's just up the road a few miles. During the call he said he didn't go see her for the last four days as he wasn't feeling too good. I made a reservation to fly out of Vegas the next day. Long story short, when I got there he was in bed with a sore back. So for the next few days I made sure he ate and kept up on his insulin. The third day I called his doctor and tried to get him in. No appointments for the next few days as the dr was on a trip. So I took him to the ER. They crated him and found a spot on his lung that after a biopsy turned out to be a rather aggressive form of lung cancer. His only concerns were that 1 Mom be taken care of and 2 that he should just be kept comfortable. The hospital recommended hospice as he was sure to need some pretty powerful pain meds. He would not let me care for him and insisted that I go back to my wife for a bit as I' d been there a month By this time. They had estimated he had between 4 and 6 months. I stayed for a few more days and then came home and made plans to return in three weeks. During all this time he had not seen Mom, his wife of 68 years due to me not being on a list to take her out for the day. As I love so far away I guess they ( Dad and my Brother) never imagined that I would be there alone. My Brother lives close by but was on a trip....... So 3 days later I get a call that Dad is not doing well. Now I'm home with my wife and two dogs one of which is a 16 year old Weimaraner in not so good health( life expectancy is 10-13yrs) the other is 8 and a virtual puppy. So I load the dogs and wife( ok, she actually gets in herself) and head out to Ohio. The next day the nurse arranges for Mom to visit him, even though she hasn't known him, or any of us, for at least 2 years and then only momentarily. Dad sees Mom and passes the next morning. We continue on and stay for two and a half weeks before heading back to Nv. 6 weeks later my Old girl has had enough. She won't eat or drink. A vet visit confirms she is eaten up with cancer too. We do the humane thing and say good bye. 
I'm sorry that this goes on and on but I really just needed to put it down on paper so to speak. 
Since all that went on my wife has taken a job based in the Phoenix area so we'll be leaving Vegas in the next couple of months. .... I hate moving !
So I guess I'll be out of the wood buying business for a big longer. But I will be back. The people on this site are top notch. 

Don

Reactions: Like 1 | Sincere 23


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## Kenbo (Jul 26, 2016)

I can actually relate to your situation more than you will ever know. In fact, the similarities of your story to mine are heartbreaking. Sending all my best thoughts to you and your family. I hope you all can find the strength to get through this and move forward together. All the best.

Reactions: Sincere 6


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## Tony (Jul 26, 2016)

Don, stay strong man. That is a lot to deal with, I'm sure it's hard in you. All my best to you and yours. Tony

Reactions: Agree 2 | Sincere 1


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## David Van Asperen (Jul 26, 2016)

@burlforbrains 
Most of us have to deal with some of that at some point ,but to have so much at once is a heavy load. My prayers go out to you and your family for healing and the strength to carry on . One day at a time is enough to deal with. Hope things can get better soon
Dave

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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## JohnF (Jul 26, 2016)

Stay strong Don.

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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## drycreek (Jul 26, 2016)

Been there done that about 11 years ago hang in there, prayers sent your way.

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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## burlforbrains (Jul 26, 2016)

Thank you to all of you who replied, I appreciate the thoughts and prayers more than I can say. We are doing our best, and it does get easier. I sincerely hope that those who have been and especially those who will be in this situation can find your strength.


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## Mike1950 (Jul 26, 2016)

Just finished dementia thing with Kathie's dad 91- 1 1/2 yrs ago - unfortunately I may be started down that route with my mother 86. Not easy. Ya have to remember them as who they were, at least that is what we try to do. We feel for you- not easy.

Reactions: Sincere 2


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## rocky1 (Jul 26, 2016)

Just went down the Dementia road with my Grandma, know exactly where you're coming from Don. The old gal was always cheerful and upbeat, sharp as a tack, and always active, clear up into her early 90s. At 95 she lost a leg to diabetes, refused to wear her prosthetic, eyesight started failing, hearing started failing, finally dementia set in lost her memory and she was often delusional. Didn't have a clue who any of the grandchildren were in the end, refused to recognize her oldest and youngest children even existed most days, which was really tough on mom, since she cared for her up until the last 6 months. 

When she finally passed, it was honestly a relief to us all; we were all tired of watching her suffer. It's tough; some days are no doubt, worse than others.

Reactions: Agree 1 | Sincere 3


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## Nature Man (Jul 26, 2016)

Tough road to travel. Just hate to hear of this type of ending to an otherwise great life. Hang in there -- things have to improve! Chuck

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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## burlforbrains (Jul 26, 2016)

Thank you all for your thoughts prayers and kind words. I appreciate the thoughtfulness of your responses and will certainly pray that none of 
our loved ones have to go through this.

Reactions: Like 1


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## woodtickgreg (Jul 26, 2016)

I went through the same with my mother years back, alzheimers, took her at 63 years old. Horrible to watch, she forgot everyone's name, mine included. Then it took her speech. And I too have lost many of my furry friends as well and had to put them down at their time of need. Thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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## NYWoodturner (Jul 28, 2016)

There are brighter skies ahead brother. stay strong and hang in there.

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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## Bigdrowdy1 (Aug 6, 2016)

Remember Don you can call anytime Bud.

Rodney

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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## burlforbrains (Aug 7, 2016)

Thanks Rodney.


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## CWS (Aug 7, 2016)

Thoughts and prayers are with Don.


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## Kevin (Aug 7, 2016)

Hang tough Don. As mentioned it *will* get better, but it's hard to see that in the midst of the storm. That's why we need family and friends . . . to remind us.

Reactions: Like 1 | Thank You! 1


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## TimR (Aug 7, 2016)

Cruel end of life quality, hope you're able to keep the faith and find comfort along the way. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

Reactions: Thank You! 1


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