# Life on the ranch



## justallan (Oct 10, 2014)

I had posted this on another forum a year or so ago, but thought it was good enough to share again.
I was riding my 4-wheeler up the mountain here on the ranch to check on a fire that we'd had the previous day and come up on a decent size bear right in the middle of the old logging road that I was on. The bear saw me and turned tail and run straight up the road. So I slowed down a bit and gave it some space. About then the road goes to switchbacks and gets a bit narrower so I'm taking my time and looking around for the bear and not seeing it, not a good feeling. I come around a corner leaning forward trying to find this bear when a pinecone falling out of a tree hits me on the shoulder. Thinking I was had, I just about broke my knee on the handle bars trying to abandon the 4-wheeler and I'm pretty confident the scream I let out sounded about like a 3 year old little girl.

Let's hear some of yours.

Reactions: Funny 17


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## JR Custom Calls (Oct 10, 2014)

Ha.

Here's one... I'll make it brief, you can fill in the blanks. Bush hog... field... tractor with no cab (this is a key piece of information)... big yellowjacket nest. Yep.

Reactions: Funny 6


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## Tony (Oct 10, 2014)

This is timely. My "real job" takes me into restaurants all day long. I was walking around the side of one this morning that is on the outskirts of town and damn near stepped on this. It was dead, but since I couldn't see that immediately, I almost had to change pants!

Reactions: Funny 11


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## Mike1950 (Oct 11, 2014)

In the winter I go to the shop in the early AM- dark- very dark with no snow. One morning-coffee cup in hand a slightly raining-I see a glint of light on antler and a loud grunt-my buddy the moose was face to face 15' away-spilled coffee all over and made a hasty retreat back in house. He thought he had won but I went out the front door and to the shop. Slingshot with ball bearing at about 30' and it was his turn to make hasty retreat over fence. We have an on going battle over who owns my backyard- at this point we are kind in a tie. Damn he stinks when you are that close............

Reactions: Funny 7


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## manbuckwal (Oct 11, 2014)

When I was about 7 or 8 i had an on going battle with a mean Ol' Rhode Island Red Rooster . From time to time when I would try and collect the eggs inside the hen house, he would come barreling in flapping his wings squaking and trying to spur me. If I saw him in time coming through the lil chicken door I would chuck an egg at him to slow him down and then hussle out . He would charge me when i would walk by the outer pen even throwing himself up against the chicken wire fence, and one day when he did it I clobbered him good with a rock, he stumbled around a few minutes as if he were drunk and then was back to his old self. Kept telling my dad about it and he would just laugh n thought it was funny, until................my two year old sis got in the pen on accident and he spurred her across the face just missing her eye.............guess what we had for dinner that night

Reactions: Funny 7


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## Mike1950 (Oct 11, 2014)

Tom's story makes me think of another. Gramps had a neighbor down the hill-June was her name. June raised chickens ducks and geese. Had some really big geese with warts on their bill. I was 8 and skinny and small for my age. The biggest goose took a liking to chasing me and I had been bit by him and was scared of him and he knew it. One day June said just stand your ground and kick him. I asked Gramps and he said it was alright and also said she was right. Put my logging boots on next time we went down there. Goose came running after me and when he got close enough I kicked him as hard as I could- ended on my butt and the goose ended on his back- quivering and honking in a funny way. Gramps and June had a good laugh. The goose finally got up. He still ran at me after that but would never get in kicking range again.........

Reactions: Funny 7


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## woodintyuuu (Oct 12, 2014)

Right now im engaged in combat with a mamma bear and two cubs, silly bears they tear up everything that includes my deer apples, they came through while i was huntin
last eve, lucky luck bears also i didnt have a bear tag. Drive my two coonhounds wild, If anyone knows a coonhound wail- its not music to your ears if your not hunting.

Reactions: Like 1 | Agree 1 | Funny 5


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## eaglea1 (Oct 13, 2014)

After talking about damn snakes  with my brother Nic, we went into the barn to do chores, and following him in, he
saw a mouse run across in front of him just inside the door. Well, it startled him so bad, he jumped real bad, and in
turn (with snakes still fresh on my mind) I jumped as well, only twice as high and almost had to peel me off the barn
ceiling. Once I figured it out, I blasted him so bad, about being afraid of a little mouse...big chicken!

Reactions: Funny 3


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## brown down (Oct 13, 2014)

a few years back I went to one of my favorite fishing holes. saw a nice palomino swimming back and forth. I rigged up and casted, what I didn't see were the two geese. the male came flying at me so I moved down stream hahah closer to the nest I didn't see. now I have the female on my right and the male closing on my left with water in front of me and thick brush behind me! I got bit by the male a few times trying to get around him.  I picked up a stick to defend myself i swung it at its head and I wish this was on film. as I swung, the stick broke in my hand hahaha so I dropped my gear and took off running! hate those birds thats why I really enjoy shooting them in season

Reactions: Funny 5


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## eaglea1 (Oct 13, 2014)

"saw a nice palomino swimming back and forth." Is this a fish Jeff? I never heard of this around us here in Muskie country.
Just thought palomino were horses and I figured you weren't trying to cast and catch a horse...

Reactions: Funny 1


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## Kevin (Oct 13, 2014)

Friday evening I was outside my shop and there was a piece of tin about 3 ft square lying next to the shop wall that had blown out of the stack I have stored under a lean-to. As I was about to bend over and pick it up, like happens everytime I pick something up outside in the snakey months, I heard my dad's voice _"Son pick the far end up first and rotate it toward you in case there's a copperhead underneath." _He also taught me not to wrap my fingers beneath the tin/wood but to just barely grab the edge so the snake doesn't bite a finger.

Just as I bent over and carefullly grabbed the edge of the tin my reading glasses fell out of my pocket and landed LOUDLY on the tin. Ever seen a leprechaun do an Irish jig while airborne?

Reactions: Funny 5


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## Schroedc (Oct 13, 2014)

I used to do a little goose hunting and around here the way it's done is to dig a pit in the cornfield, put out your decoys and get down in the pit and wait for the geese to come on down to feed by your decoys. Well, they came in I took a shot and this goose wobbles and then lands right in my pit. So here I am with a pissed off goose flapping and biting and hissing trying to do me in. Finally managed to whack him really hard with the butt of the gun and put him out of my misery. Here's where it gets interesting.... When we cleaned all our geese for the day on this one we couldn't find a single hole in him. To this day don't know why the heck he wobbled and fell in my hole. Must have just scared him that badly when the gun went off......

Reactions: Funny 3


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## brown down (Oct 13, 2014)

eaglea1 said:


> "saw a nice palomino swimming back and forth." Is this a fish Jeff? I never heard of this around us here in Muskie country.
> Just thought palomino were horses and I figured you weren't trying to cast and catch a horse...



they are stocked trout! I've never caught one before. they are a cross between a rainbow and a brook trout I believe. you can't miss them they are bright bright yellow

https://www.google.com/search?q=pal...ENfj_sATag4GgCQ&ved=0CCIQsAQ&biw=1876&bih=931

Reactions: Way Cool 2 | Informative 1


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## eaglea1 (Oct 14, 2014)

How cool is that! Thanks for the link.


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## Kevin (Oct 14, 2014)

Are they good eating? They'd almost have to be.


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## brown down (Oct 14, 2014)

I have heard they are mushy. I only know a few people that have caught them and most of the time they have them mounted.. I don't eat stocked trout only natives brooks and browns! our gun club stocks over 3000 fish in a ¼ mile stretch of what my buddies and I refer to as "the ditch". every year they have a tournament for the kids and usually stock about 30 plus fish over 20 inches not to mention the 600 other trout. adults are allowed to fish after the tournament is over!! I get a kick out of the guys that just go for that fish because they can see it and throw everything at them but the kitchen sink. I have cut a few peoples lines because they get so frustrated and snag the fish with bass lures. I have almost gone to blows with a few guys but hey, not at my club or anywhere for that matter! I just calmly walk over and ask them to cut their line free and if they don't I am more than happy to do it for them!! they are a very pretty fish and stick out like a sore thumb!! I have pictures somewhere of me fishing with my nephews at the ditch! I'll dig them up.


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## Kevin (Oct 14, 2014)

brown down said:


> I have almost gone to blows with a few guys but hey, not at my club or anywhere for that matter! I just calmly walk over and ask them to cut their line free and if they don't I am more than happy to do it for them!!



Yikes. If you're going to take on the mantle of game warden, you might consider letting them land the fish to remove the line and tackle from it. Better for the fish so it doesn't get hung up and drown, better for the environment to keep the mono out of the stream, and possibly better for you if one day you bite off more than you can chew doing that. No matter what your motive, it is an overt act of aggression and some men will not take that lying down. Be safe out there Jeff!

JMO.

Reactions: Agree 1


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## brown down (Oct 14, 2014)

I def get what you are saying... I never go out looking for a fight but I am prepared if one arises if that makes sense. I always have my sidearm on me which is a huge deterrent if someone starts acting froggy! The few times this has happened I walked into the ditch and netted the fish, removed the hooks and brought it safely down stream or up stream, have done it a few times, it pisses them off but in the end I could care less about their feelings! especially when you are doing it in front of kids of all ages!! I had one guy, one time follow me and my buddy up stream to see where we released it, reeled his line in all the way up to about 6 inches and literally put the hook in its mouth. there was a game warden there at that particular time and there wasn't anything he could do because he caught it legally in about 1 foot of water! what people will do for a fish when you can buy them at the store!!!

Reactions: Informative 1


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## ripjack13 (Feb 20, 2016)

Bump....I know there's some good stories we aint heard yet...

Reactions: Agree 1


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## Tony (Feb 20, 2016)

When I was about 8 my dad and I were going hunting. We were walking out to our stands in the morning. He turned to say something to me, said "FREEZE!!!!". I did, he pulled his pistol, shot at my feet. I looked down and there was a large rattlesnake across my boots with it's head blown off. I wore it as a belt for a long, long time. Tony

Reactions: Way Cool 1


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